A New Year Wish for You

I was thinking I might write something inspirational about the new year, about leaving the old behind because focusing on the past is a waste of time, and about being more present in the present because focusing on the unknown future is also a waste of time.

Now, notice I did not say planning for the future is a waste of time, but focusing on the unknown future is a waste of time, because when we focus on the future, usually that means we are worrying about it. Planning for the future, on the other hand is what this message is all about.

Each of us has an opportunity every day to make ourselves, and our lives anew. For the new year, I like to clean out the old ( I made a trip to the thrift store this last week, the car full of boxes of unused clothes, dusty books, and brick-brack that has lost it’s meaning), and make room for the new. I also like to think about how I can improve myself, with the thought in mind that if I can improve on me, then everything around me will get caught up in that new and improved “vibe”, and my life will change for the better. I think I could improve on me by spending a little more time exercising, and making a commitment to meditate 10 minutes ( or more) each day. These two changes are simple and very do-able. I've already started.

That is something that I think we all may be thinking about this new year- changing our lives for the better. It’s been a tough year for a lot of people, and ignoring that fact is like tip toeing around the elephant in the room. We can’t change what has happened to the economy, the housing market, stocks and our savings. We can’t get back the lost jobs, and we can’t ignore the fact that it’s been a challenging year. We probably all know someone who has been affected by the events in the past year.

So for the new year, I hope that we can all let go of the past, look to the future and know that change is inevitable, and that change, although challenging and even frightening at times, means that there is the possibility for something new, unexpected and really good to happen.

While I was pondering this new year message, This e-mail came from James Ray international, a motivation organization. I think it outlines some great steps for anyone thinking about how to improve their lives for the New Year. I wanted to share it with you. I pondered each step outlined by Mr. Ray, thinking about how it related to me, my life as it has been and how a change, based on some of these suggestions could effect my life in the future. I think it's really helpful, and I hope you to do.

I'm wishing you a happy, healthy and prosperous new year, full of life affirming change that takes you to the place in your life that you really want to be! Peace, -Meandering


James Arthur Ray
President/CEO
James Ray International

Ten Tips for Thriving in This Economic Winter

Many of you have read and commented on our recent conversation about how it's a season to sow, how there's so much fear in our world right now and how it's related to some of the universal laws that modern society has forgotten.

Well, you asked for some quick, easy-to-apply tips on how to thrive in this economic winter and on how to apply the knowledge you learned during our conversation... So here you go!

1. Clearly define what inspires you.
   There's a big difference between taking action out of inspiration versus desperation. Use this season as an opportunity to hibernate into the recesses of your own mind and define what you choose to create in your next spring.
2. Control your focus.
   Energy flows where attention goes. Are you focusing on lack or opportunity?
3. Feed your mind.
   What's your constant mental diet? Do you spend hours in front of the scare news or are you reading good books, attending more positive seminars, watching uplifting DVDs and listening to powerful CDs?
4. Strengthen your body.
   Your physical health and vitality have a tremendous impact on your performance as well as your mental and emotional fitness. Exercise releases stress as well as strengthen your body and mind.
5. Inventory your friends.
   Doom and gloom attracts more doom and gloom. Jettison those "energy vampires" around you and surround yourself with opportunity seekers.
6. Quiet your mind.
   Take time to meditate daily and to slow down if only for a few minutes. Ten to fifteen minutes of meditation will relieve hours of stress and increase creativity and resourcefulness.
7. Rid your life of escapist activities.
   Overindulgence in TV, sleep and alcohol only accelerate the problems you're attempting to avoid.
8. Make a daily gratitude list.
   Focusing on all the good, gifts and God in your life puts you in the right line of thought, feeling and their subsequent actions, which will attract and create more good, gifts and God.
9. Change your attitude.
   Realize that everything that's happened in your life thus far is here to serve you, teach you and help you grow. Find the lessons in your past results, forgive yourself for anything you could have done better and apply the lesson to move forward and create a better future.
10. Get resourceful.
    For the next three days, go to a place where you can have uninterrupted time... Come up with 20 new ideas to grow your income, create new results and improve your life. You cannot leave your spot until you have twenty. And no editing! All ideas are good ideas. Do this for three successive days with 20 new ideas each day.
    
    Now take your list of 60 unique ideas and pick the three to five most powerful and leveraged ones to put into action. Pick these three to five based on: ease of implementation, rate of return and speed of return.

And so during this winter season, remember: It's not about resources... there are plenty of them. It's about resourcefulness. Get resourceful and get busy.

To your continued wealth and happiness,

James Arthur Ray
President/CEO
James Ray International

One of my regular readers sent me this account of her chance encounter with abject terror- it's a warning really, to all of us, that Christmas shopping can be damaging to your mental health and a trip to the toy store can, at times, lead to irreversible psychological and emotional damage. Thank You Jane for sharing this!

Ah yes- the Christmas season is upon us and so I

forced myself to go shopping (which I truly hate).

First stop-one of those very popular everything stores.

Having really only 1 young person to shop for I decided to

hit the toy isle first and get that chore out of the way.

I mindlessly wandered up and down the isles looking at all

of the "stuff" they didn't have when I was a kid. Transformers,

those ugly Brat dolls, kids learning computers, all kinds of jewelry

making kits(cool) and than the Barbies-Oh my God! What the heck

is it? The Birds Barbie! Have you seen it? Do you remember when

you were finally old enough to watch that movie for the first time?

Who the heck thought a woman being pecked by birds was a good idea for a doll? I can remember cowering on the couch with my siblings-big pillows on our laps to hide in- watching that movie when I was young-maybe around 8 or 9- and it scared the crap out of me! Yep, that's something I want to remember with a special collector doll. It totally freaked me out and I just wanted to run out of the store screaming!!!

Oh- wait- I'm all grown up now and the birds don't really do that-YET!

For more on this "collectible" Barbie go to http://www.barbiecollector.com/

Don't say I didn't warn you-it's eerie!

While you are on the Barbie website check out the mean witch from the

Wizard of OZ- just goes to show-every one can be beautiful-if you are Barbie.

Jesus, Mary and Joseph! Have you ever seen anything so frightening? Thank you Jane. Now I'm going to have nightmares too.

Happy Holidays, Meandering

Woo Hoo!

We had one extra minute of daylight today!
Woo Hoo- we are on the flip side baby, spinning back to the sun and longer days! Woo Hoo! Sunlight rules!

Meander with Me a While, and Leave Your Good Ideas in the Comment Section.

Amidst all this holiday fa-la-la-ing, I’ve been meandering around the current issue of putting people back to work. I think Obama and Joe have some good ideas, and, as a patriotic and concerned citizen I have a few more ideas for them that they can have- no charge.

First, lets make it a rule that if your corporate headquarters is in the USofA, your call center must be as well. Now I think that would put a lot of people to work, and you and I would have the customer service advantage of actually being able to understand the English that our call center representative is using to talk to us a mile a minute. Now, I know regional accents can be a bit confusing at times but hey- I would much rather try to decipher a deep south “can I help you” than a English as a second language learned in a 6 week course ‘can I help you”. I have more patience when I know the call center is supporting the economy of our great nation, and I always love finding out the person is somewhere across the country and asking how the weather is there, and where is a good place to eat if I ever happen to be in their town.

While we are at it, making rules that is- lets say that if your corporate phone menu has more than two selections you must have operators answering the incoming calls and directing people to the correct extension. This would make all our lives much easier and probably save millions of dollars in lost work time as we all know we are making those calls that take 17 different menu selections and 54 minutes to complete on work time.

Why don’t we outlaw those noisy gas guzzling riding mowers, leaf blowers and weed whackers? Make yard work a teen age occupation once again. We would save gas, reduce noise pollution, and get teenagers off their lazy butts and away from the computer long enough to make a little cash for that next game they want. In the process they might loose a few pounds and teen obesity would be reduced as well as health care costs, as many overweight teens become overweight adults with diabetes and heart disease which the cost of medicating put a drain on our health care system. What if someone –like an elderly person on a fixed income- can’t afford to pay a teen? Well, put those welfare recipients, the ones who can’t get a job because they don’t have skills, to work doing yard work for those on a fixed income. Anyone can learn how to mow a yard or wack a weed. Make it mandatory for any able bodied person who is now collecting welfare.

While we are on the subject of welfare- why not make being a stay at home parent an occupation paid for by the government? That’s what welfare is you say? Well, let’s change it a bit- lets say one parent can stay home and get a salary, which is fixed- regardless of the number of children in the family. That might just be incentive for people to stop having so many kids they can’t take care of. Think about it- You only get so much a year. If you only have one kid, there will be a lot more to spend on the really important things- like booze, cigarettes, tattoos and those really fine rims for your shag mobile. Then, make counseling mandatory for any parent in the program, that would put a lot of people to work doing the counseling ( not to mention doing the accounting and paperwork for the program) and the parents would have an opportunity to learn to parent. We could also give them job training starting when ever they want, or if they don’t want- when the child is 16. That would give them two years to learn a skill and get a job before the gravy train stops running.

This program would also be an advantage for those single parent families where the parent is barely making enough to cover child care so they can go to work. Let them get paid to stay at home and be a parent to their child. Give the low pay- hundred hour a week job to someone who does not have a child at home that they are trying very hard to raise right.

If we can spend billions putting our troops overseas, why can’t we spend some money funding after school care centers in every neighborhood in the US? That would put a lot of people to work, taking care of all those kids who live in homes where both parents work. The cost could be subsidized, parents who could pay, and make it very reasonably priced, something could. Those who can’t- don’t.

Speaking of our troops- why don’t we bring them home and put them along our boarders where they belong? Now, I know, there is not much for them to do along the boarders, but they could be developing new green technology, helping in poor neighborhoods- kinda like a peace corps. This would give the military a new meaning, defending America and strengthening our country at the same time it did wonders for boarder town economies. Now don’t get me wrong- I do think they could still do their military exercises and be prepared for what ever it is they prepare for.

I do love the space program, but at this point, I think it’s time to cut a lot of the funding and get all those NASA eggheads into the high schools to develop world class science programs for our young people. I figure if they can put a man on the moon they can probably figure out a way to make science attractive to teenagers and before long the USofA would be tops again in science and technology training. The NASA eggheads would design the programs, and train many more science teachers to do the teaching. We could give schools incentives to spend as much on their science programs as they do on their sports programs. While we are at it, let’s get new built in the USA computers into every school and the IT instructors to go with them.

Why don’t we subsidize salaries for people who work with the elderly, the disabled and kids? Where would we get the money? Why don’t we cut all those tax breaks to big corporations who really should be paying the taxes because they are making all that money! Make jobs that require you to take care of another human important, and make them pay well. We would have more people going into the fields and eventually, enough workers to really fill the needs of our most vulnerable populations. The fact that jobs in these professions are low pay, high turnover is a disgrace to our nation.

Now, at this point you are probably thinking- boy that Meandering sure has some good solid ideas for putting people to work. We should vote for her next time. Now, stay with me because I’m gonna get a little out there on you, but I think, when I’m finished you will still be saying “good idea!” I have also been pondering how to make jobs and improve the health of our population at the same time. This is a little harder to do than just create jobs- however, I think it’s important because not only are a lot of people out of work, our great country can boast the poorest health and the most spent on health care of any developed nation. We really have to turn this around.

How about we learn something from China, where it has been scientifically proven that a population that does Tai Chi on a regular basis is healthier and spends less on health care. They actually have schools to train Tai Chi instructors, and then they place them in neighborhoods to lead regular exercise for the population. It’s considered a great job, and the exercise classes are so popular, there are millions of people doing Tai Chi everyday. I think we should do the same thing.

A scientific study on meditation done in Washington DC showed that crime rates went down in the DC area when they had round the clock meditation practitioners sending out “the vibe” – no, I’m not kidding. We could make meditation a good paying job and set up centers in all the big cities. Keep the vibe going 24/7 and reduce crime rates while we created a lot of jobs.

And last but not least- It’s also been scientifically proven that grain fed beef ( what you typically buy and eat) has way more Omega 6 ( the bad kind) fatty acids than Omega 3 ( the good kind) fatty acids, and this translates to- eating omega 6 beef throws your omega fatty acid balance way off and causes your cholesterol to go way up and your body to be in a state of inflammation all the time which can lead to diabetes, heart disease, arthritis and other serious health problems. However- cattle that eat grass have lots more omega 3’s than omega 6-es, just as the lord intended, and eating that kind of beef is not a health hazard. Now, most people will not give up the beef, but we could bring back free range cattle, and cowboys/cowgirls. Make cattle herding a great paying job, and require the beef industry to set the cattle free. Make it illegal to lot feed, and grain fatten beef, and get rid of the outdated and polluting methods of raising beef that we have now.

Now, I know this is a lot to digest all at once, and there is a lot to consider when you go about makin’ rules and cutting funding and adding funding and using public money and shuttling dollars from big business to care for the disabled. Once you’ve had a time to ponder all this, why don’t you leave a comment with your idea of how to improve the job situation in this country. Once all the suggestions are in, I will send this to the Obama-Biden transition team so they can ponder it too. Oh, yes, they will read it, they owe me one, I’m holding a “health care reform community discussion” for them in my town.

Once you are done putting in your two cents worth, get back to the fa-la-la-ing, ‘tis the season.

Get Your Christmas On

It’s time my friends, to nuzzle down into the comfort of holiday traditions.
We’ve got holidays galore this time of year, all you have to do is select your favorite and jump right in to the merry making.

It’s the dark time of the year, but the solstice, that pagan celebration of the renewal of the sun, is just weeks away.

For you science fans- The Earth's axis of rotation makes an angle of about 23.44° called the "obliquity of the ecliptic" (good name for a jazz band). As a consequence, for half the year the northern hemisphere tips to the Sun, with the maximum around June 21st, the longest day of the year, while for the other half year the northern hemisphere tips away from the sun, with the maximum around December 21st, the shortest day of the year. The two moments when the inclination of Earth's rotational axis has maximum effect are the solstices.

The longest night of the year gives way to the earth tipping back to the warmth and light of summer, and that is the best reason to celebrate as far as I can tell.

However, you might be thinking that Christmas is what makes this time of year special, a babe born on a cold winter night, a babe huddled in a manger with animals who spoke. Given gifts by three wise men who, wisely, brought essential oils of frankincense, and myrrh. Christians celebrate this miraculous birth of the symbol of their religion and the savior of so many souls.

More for you science fans- Actually, experts think Jesus was born in July, not December, and that the church moved his birthday to coincide with the solstice celebrations, hoping to distract the pagans and win them over. According to the scientific information above, in the southern hemisphere, in July, it would have been winter and cold as it gets in the desert. Meanwhile, Frankincense and Myrrh oils are both high is sesquiterpenes, chemicals that awaken the emotional centers of the brain, and increase immune system function-good idea for a baby born in a barn in the winter!

Maybe Christmas is special to you because you just love the folk tale of a fat guy in a red suit who trains reindeer to fly- (in Siberia it’s thought that a Shaman can turn into a flying reindeer to journey to the spirit world- think there is some connection?) and brings toys to all the good girls and boys. Maybe the attraction is everything that goes with the folk tale- decorations, lights, trees, tinsel, music, parties. Or maybe the attraction is the candy, cookies, fudge, pies, fruit cakes, strudel, eggnog, and other seasonal ways to add weight. Maybe the rampant commercialism that marks the season in an over developed country like ours is right up your alley. What ever the draw, the season is here.

Let us not forget that not every one in the world is either pagan or Christian. There are other holidays we can choose from and acknowledge at this time of year, such as the festival of lights known as Hanukkah, central to the Jewish faith, and Kwanzaa, the celebration of African American history and culture. There is also Boxing Day - celebrated in countries once ruled by Britain. The roots of this holiday go back to the Middle Ages, when, on the day after Christmas, members of the merchant class would take boxes, fill them with food and fruits, and give them to servants, trades people and the less fortunate. Servants would be given a day off to celebrate after presumably working 24/7 for the past month to prepare for Christmas in the master’s house.

It seems there is a holiday for everyone, and all you have to do is get in the mood.

Now my scientific survey of random shoppers indicates there are a few souls out there that just haven’t found the Christmas spirit yet. ( translation- nasty bugger of an old lady cussing under her breath at the check out counter a few days ago telling me about “the damn season anyway- buy, buy, buy, that’s all people thinks about these days.”)

So, if you have worries that are making it hard to be in the “festival zone” for the holidays, if your troubles are overwhelming- if you have to much stress at work/home/school/with relatives/finances/kids/pets/that damn car/ what ever- let me help you with this guide to getting your Christmas on.

There are numerous ways to find your Christmas spirit, if it happens to be missing. Let’s look at a few of them-

What says holiday like an evening cuddled up in front of the TV watching Bing and Danny get the girls? Full of memorable music, and one of my favorite choreographed scenes – (Bing and Danny changing clothes after the “sisters” show, while they have a little heart to heart talk. I wonder how many times they went through that complicated routine before it was looking like they didn’t have to think about it?), White Christmas is a classic, along with Love Actually, Christmas Vacation, Scrooged, and - insert your favorite holiday movie title here. There are so many fine movies and TV specials to choose from- who can resist a re-run of A Charlie Brown Christmas (originally released Dec. 9th, 1965!) , or The Grinch Who Stole Christmas or - insert the name of your favorite holiday special here- . So gather up the snacks, preferably holiday-ish ones, a blank-ee, some DVD’s and hit the couch for some holiday down time with the TV.

The Holiday season would just not be complete with out the holiday music that engulfs us from early November right through the New Year. I don’t mind, I mean, quit complaining and lend your voice to the merriment and get into the music! Sing at the top of your lungs, all those songs you remember from high school choir. Hum along with the ones you don’t know- and get up and dance when the moment permits- like in the grocery store when you hear “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” start blaring from the store wide speakers. Nothing will elevate your mood, (nothing legal anyway), and put you in the spirit, like a bit of song and dance, and hey, it’s good exercise too!

Decorations are everywhere. In fact, I think the stores just run in with a paint brush after Halloween and paint all those pumpkins white and try to pass them off as snowmen. To get in a holiday mood, get ye a thermos of hot chocolate and pile in the car to cruse the ‘hood and take in all the decorations. I took a walk last night and sure enough, once around the block and an eye full of brightly lit Santas, snowmen, candy canes and holly wreaths left me feeling like I should turn on the tree lights and flick the switch for my own display of little twinklies on the porch. I passed many homes with multiple trees viewed through windows and wondered where they got enough spirit to decorate not one, but two trees! If your town has a major lights display, and the traffic is not too horrendous (our town does and the traffic is) you can cruse that rather than the neighborhood, that way, you are not likely to be taken for a criminal “casing the joint” to look for piles of presents to make your holiday bright.

What better way to get in the mood for a holiday than to cook up the delights of the season. Notice I say cook up, not eat up. This, my friends, is because it is better to give than receive, better to bake and give away than bake and eat. Unless of course you really want to be two sizes larger by March. So get out your favorite holiday goodie recipes and make a bunch of sweet stuff to pass off on your friends. Personally, I say to heck with the cookies, if we are going to make sweet stuff, lets cut out the white flour and add more sugar, so this year I’m making candy. And, in case that alone doesn’t give me that warm fuzzy holiday season feeling I decided to make rum balls and bourbon pralines, so I have to have a couple of bottles of booze in the house for the candy making. Now most of you have seen that recipe for fruit cake where the cook drinks the brandy and throws the egg beater out the window. That is where I got the idea for the boozy candy.

While the goodies are cooking, get out the check book and write a little something to your favorite charity. It doesn’t have to be a large sum, just a little something. Nothing says holiday mood like remembering those that are less fortunate than our selves. While you are at it, write out a holiday card to someone who is probably not going to get a card from anyone else. I bet if you look through your date book, address book or e-mail file you can zero in on someone whose holiday would be a lot brighter if just one card landed in their mailbox. If you still have something to give, that won’t put your own finances in a bind, head out to the mall and find the giving tree. Pick a card off the tree and go to it. This may be one of the most holiday mood manifesting rituals ever invented by humans. Giving a bunch of holiday joy to some child you don’t even know, can elevate your mood and affect their life deeply, in ways you will never even know. What could be more holiday-ee?

So go now, get your Christmas on- and have a happy holiday, which ever holiday you choose to celebrate!

Train Your Mind Change Your Brain

Here is the link to the Mind and Life Institute. The institute sponsors meetings each year with The Dalai Lama and the worlds top scientists. In the following post, I mention the book that was written about the 2004 meeting, Train Your Mind Change Your Brain.

http://www.mindandlife.org/

Your Brain in a Nutshell

On Tuesday November 18th I was musing on the idea of being able to catch non-productive or unhealthy thoughts as they arise and realize them for what they are and let them go. How do we do this is the question I posed. Well, I’ve been doing a little research on that very topic so I can enlighten you while you waste your boss’s time reading blogs and having that extra cup of coffee before you really get to work.

I picked up this fascinating book called “Train Your Mind Change Your Brain” by Sharon Begley (with a foreword by His Holiness The Dalai Lama). This book is touted as a “groundbreaking collaboration between neuroscience and Buddhism”. Before I go any further I should warn you that I think physics textbooks are entertaining. I also think scientific experiments are engaging. I love to learn how people learn about all kinds of interesting things.

I’m about half way through the book now, and it’s all about the ways that the brain can grow and change, even after your body is fully grown. It’s called brain plasticity, and it’s all the rage among neuroscientists, even though just a few years ago the concept of brain plasticity was laughed right out of all the best scientific journals. This is a good example of how narrow minded science can be, the people who are supposed to be discovering new things often don’t even want to talk about new things!

Previously it was thought that you are born with a bunch of brain cells, you grow a bunch more when you are a baby learning all kinds of new things, you start to loose brain cells when you become an adolescent (maybe they are transformed into excess hormones), and this loss continues through young adulthood (accelerated greatly by your choice of recreational chemicals), and speeds up as you age until you eventually die with a shriveled up brain the size of a walnut.

Now however, it has been proven that this is not true! No, science has traveled into the unknown to prove that you only loose all those brain cells if you don’t take care of them, nourish them and invite them to grow.

Now I’m not going to tell you the whole story, read the book if you want that, but I will tell you there are dozens of experiments detailed so the reader sees the progression of one theory to the next and the amazing discoveries that first led researchers to imagine the brain was actually adjusting its cells, functions and usage, based on the persons activities.

I will throw this little bit of information out at you: voluntary exercise on a regular basis makes your brain grow. Bad news for couch potatoes I know. And I say voluntary because the experiment looked at brains of mice who exercised for fun (turns out mice love to run on those little wheels you see in gerbil cages), and brains of mice who were forced to exercise ( picture a white coated lab tech holding a mouse at gun point and forcing it to lift weights) actually, that is not how they did it, I won’t go into the details, but bottom line, the voluntary mice grew to be much smarter.

Now skip ahead to the part on applications for humans and we find that people with obsessive compulsive disorders can be trained to watch their thoughts as the compulsions come and rationalize what these thoughts mean, and how they arise from a chemical imbalance rather than being an intrinsic part of the person and sure enough, after they practice for a while, the obsessive behavior patterns lessen and disappear.

So dear readers, this takes us right back where we started. When you are in a situation that causes thoughts of anger or anxiety to arise, if you try to look at the thoughts and analyze them before you react, your brain will actually learn from what you just did, add more brain function resources to repeating this task in the future, and make it easier for you to do this again.

See? You are not alone! Your brain is helping you! You can learn to think before you react. You can become the type of person who is able to react with compassion rather than anger. You can learn to put that wave of anxiety to bed and think calm healing thoughts even when the going is rough.

Now, I’m sure as I get further into that book I will learn lots of tid-bits about how the process is actually done, but for now, I will just share how I think it might be done.

Next time someone you know acts like an ass and you start to get mad- catch the mad feeling. Stop for a moment and ask yourself what am I feeling? Acknowledge your feelings, then ask yourself if you can imagine any reason that person might be acting like such an ass.

Maybe they had a worse day then the one you are having. Maybe someone they know died, or left them, or is in the hospital, or is missing. Maybe they got fired, divorced or a speeding ticket on the way to work. Maybe they are hungry, hung over or really mentally unstable. Maybe they are all kinds of bad things you can imagine.

Now, this does not excuse them, but it does give you an opportunity to say to yourself- I’m glad I’m not like that. I’m glad I don’t have any of those horrible imagined problems they have. I’m gonna shine that on. I’m not taking the bait. I feel sorry for that ass. They must be having way bigger problems than I have. (if nothing else they have a big problem because they are such an ass no one likes them), Than you can ignore their assy-ness, or ask them if they are OK, or maybe even ask if here is some way you can help them because they are obviously having a bad day.

The same steps can be used for anxiety. When you feel it coming on – Like the Obsessive Compulsion disorder patients,( which, by the way, OCD is an anxiety problem,) you can say to your self- I’m feeling anxiety. This situation is a real ass, but it won’t help for me to be an ass back. Let me just calm down. This situation will soon change. (here’s where that Buddhist concept of impermanence comes in real handy), If I just remain calm and take steps to peacefully resolve this situation things are going to change. My anxiety does not change any thing, things just change.

Now, according to this research I’ve reviewed, if you just keep practicing this over and over it will become easier. From the looks of the news headlines, you may be getting a lot of practice, and this skill is going to become very valuable in the coming months.

Holiday Survival Tips

One of my friends admitted to me that she wasn’t looking forward to the holidays, specifically, because of personality conflicts among extended family members.

Well, you and everybody else!

Yes. It’s that time again when we gather with relatives, just as we have gathered for millennium, and complain behind backs about weird odors, artificial body parts, strange habits, and obnoxious behavior- kind of a real life version of the holiday classic “Christmas Vacation”. (I can’t help it, I laugh so hard I think I’m gonna pee every time I see the scene where the squirrel comes flying out of the Christmas tree and attaches to Chevy Chase’s back- thus, the movie is a holiday classic!)

Why, oh why, do we continue to reenact this strange and painful behavior? It’s kind of like the lemmings rushing off the cliff face to death in the sea because that’s the way they have always done it! For more on the lemmings-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWuiGWkd7mM

This informative look at darling rodents with brains approximately the size of peas will entertain, inform and gasp- reflect! If you have a soft spot for furry little creatures, I strongly caution you- the film captures the result of this mindless lemming behavior, with footage of numerous little wet, lifeless lemming bodies adrift in the ocean. Not pretty. Not pretty at all.

I highly advise you spend the holiday doing what ever it is single people who live far away from family do- that is, what ever they please.

However, if you are one of those people who will be excommunicated from the family if you don’t cheerfully participate in the holiday, then read on, this is for you.

Yes. It’s time to gather round the table with a group of people that you wish you didn’t know, but you are chained to by genetics or marriage. Time to put on a big smile and eat the green bean casserole, the burned biscuits and the woefully undercooked turkey ( But it’s been in the oven for hours! It can’t be raw!), followed by a big slice of Aunt Abby’s devil-may-care-dieter’s-delight-vanilla-green tea-fondue-crisp-peanut butter-grape pie.

So, I decided to do you a big favor and just pass along a few tips for a peaceful holiday with the family.

1. No matter how bad it gets, do not drink copious amounts of alcohol – it’s not going to make things better, and God knows when you accidentally vomit on Uncle Chester the whole family is going to get a lot louder. Not only that, But if you are too drunk to drive they are gonna arm wrestle the keys away from you, make you sleep on the couch, and then you are going to have to face them all again in the morning. So be smart. Stay close to sober.
2. Smile and nod when spoken to, If you have nothing to say, keep a plate of appetizers in your lap and each time someone speaks to you expecting a response, shove something like peanut butter anchovy spread on rye cracker in your mouth, gesture wildly with your hand that your mouth is full and smile some more.
3. Cruse antique shops until you see one of those long ear horns that you always see in movies, purchase it, and take it to the holiday dinner with you. Explain to all in a loud voice that- you’ve developed a case of tinnitus, stumping your normally brilliant doctors. No cure is evident and you can’t hear a blasted thing, however they can yell into “this here brass horn” to speak with you. When ever any one does yell into the horn, politely yell back as if you can’t tell how loud you are talking. Pretty soon everyone will just smile and nod at you and pretty much leave you alone. This is a fantastic way to avoid hearing all the gory intimate details of your cousin’s private life, unless of course your cousin is determined to talk about her STD even if she has to yell.
4. Approach the eating as if you are on a important diet- you might want to amaze everyone with the fact that you are a straight A student in your on-line astronaut training program ( yes, aunt Jenny, it’s fully certified and recognized), and in the near future you will have to have a pre-flight physical assessment. The requirement is 10 pounds under what you weigh, ( what ever your weight may be) and you are determined to be on the first manned flight to Uranus. Take only one small spoon of each dish, thus avoiding hurting the cooks feelings with out having to suffer through actually eating their food. You can play it up by bemoaning the fact that you just can’t eat more of their wonderful cooking, you will just have to pine over those candied sweet potatoes with juju beans and marshmallow fennel sauce until next year.
5. When confronted with the inevitable inquires into the state of your job, quickly glance to the left and right with narrowed eyes, grab your inquisitor by the shoulder and yank them close, lower you voice and say ”Honestly Auntie Em, I can’t talk about it. We just got a big contract with Homeland security, but it’s very high security clearance and I just can not disclose anything”. Then wink, nod yes, and change the subject. Now don’t get all crazy with this one, if you want to say CIA or FBI instead, make sure it’s plausible. If you are a shoe sales person or a waste removal technician, Homeland security is a better bet, they have people everywhere. If you are with a high tech firm, or travel a lot for work, than yes, CIA or FBI might fly.
6. When you are asked the inevitable questions about your significant other (or your lack there of) just refer to # 5 and add, I met someone really nice through our contract with homeland security, but honestly, they are very high security clearance, I just can not talk about them at all. Then smile, wink, nod yes and change the subject.
7. When asked the inevitable question about when you are going to settle down and have kids, refer to #5, and add- “the world is so unstable right now, ( if you can muster up a teary far away look in your eyes, it’s helpful at this point), so threatening, I just don’t think it’s the right time. Besides, my therapist says I’m to narcissistic to raise children and I pay him enough, he ought to know. I am working through this in therapy and I just have to wait until all my issues are resolved. It hurts to talk about this you know, I do so love children.”
8. Now, to avoid after dinner conversation and stupid games, you can start the evening off by offering to mix those after dinner drinks. Add more than the normal allotment of alcohol, and if you are lucky the combination of extra booze and all that food will put everyone over 40 into a stupor in no time. Then you can hang out and basically spend the evening alone.
9. If you just can’t stand the thought of a day with the relatives, you can arrive with a dish that lacks one ingredient. Proclaim “Oh God, I forgot to pick up the garnish for this casserole- let me just run down to the quick mart and get some pistachio brittle to go on top of it, I will be right back.” ( The key to this is, of course, not naming a garnish that could possibly already be in the house. Keep it exotic or you are trapped! Also, you must make it a point to say – “oh, by the way, Mom, did you try to call me earlier? My cell phone battery is dead and I can’t find my charger- I will get a new one next week”.) Leave the house and don’t look back. Go to the local subway shop, enjoy a turkey sub. Head over to your favorite hang out and have a drink, watch the game or go shopping, what ever- see, the day is yours now. Don’t return to the house until you are sure that the dinner is over, drinks are done, and all the relatives are gone. Then, stumble in with a dazed and confused look on your face. Ask what day it is, what time it is and “ how long was I gone?.” Then explain you were driving up the road, saw a large object hovering over the intersection and just as you got to it a bright light seemed to explode from under it and you don’t remember anything else until you just walked in the door.

OK folks, that is all the holiday survival tips I have time for today, I have to get busy and make the pumpkin pie, it’s my turn this year.

Gaden Shartse World Tour - part one

I just spent several hours getting warmed up to blog. I did this by exercising my talent for stringing words together by creating several entertaining articles for a web site that hires ghost writers, talent unseen, untested, and unknown, to write for them. Today I captivated my audience with tales of my adventures surfing the big waves on the North Shore. For those of you who spend way to much time in front of a computer or otherwise encapsulated in a sedentary indoors life style, the North Shore is the north shore, literally, of Oahu, Hawaii.

Yes, this is where the big waves break, and the little surfers get broken. Of course I used my considerable experience with the art of surfing to compile a pile of highly suspect, but passable to the un-initiated, yarns of surf-dome adventure under the moniker Big Bill “Flipflop” Kakaman-o-tikibarkanni.

Now that my blogging butt is well settled into the chair, I’ve had my ration of 14 cups of coffee and my finger muscles are warmed up and ready for some serious typing, I thought I would write a little about my latest adventures in international cooperation and understanding.

As you know, I recently had the pleasure of spending a little time with “my Monks”, the Monks of Gaden Shartse Monastery. These Monks travel the world as ambassadors of the dharma, bringing Buddhist teachings to everyone they come in contact with. Many of the people involved with the success of the Monks tour are dyed in the wool Buddhist practitioners. Others, like myself are on the fringe, still grasping for the light of understanding from any bulb they come in contact with. It is really amazing to see these dharma spreaders in action, and even more amazing to have the opportunity to spend time with them along the path they travel.

I think the thing that stands out most in my mind is how everyone they meet is all over them like ducks on a June bug. I mean, people just want to be near them, to talk with them, to have a photo with them, to exchange smiles with them. Even the most introverted individual seems to bloom in their presence. Every where we went, and I do mean we, as I followed them around pretty much full time for nine days, they had lines of people waiting to speak with them after each event.

Everyone had questions, from “Do you wear sandals even in the winter? And “does your shaved head get cold a lot?” to “Can you, in three minutes or less, explain the nature of existence and the teachings of the Buddha?” No matter what the questions, the Monks always had a thoughtful answer. Of course, it probably didn’t hurt that they all are extremely intelligent and have many years of schooling. We actually had the honor of a couple valedictorians and a summa cum laude ( what is that? Latin for “guy who gets all A’s”? ) on the tour. Each Monk was also a master of a particular specialty, like chant master and ritual master. If the Monks were a poker hand we would have been in the big money. The monastery honors us by sending only it’s brightest scholars so that we will get the best answers to our probing questions, like – what can we do to handle our anger or disappointments? - a question that I noticed was asked over and over.

I guess us westerners have more than our fill of anger and disappointment. I have to wonder though, is it because of the way we look at life? I wonder, have we become spoiled by our capitalistic life styles? Have we been nurtured beyond a healthy understanding that sometimes bad things do happen? Are we all Polly Annas? Do we become angry and disappointed because we expect everything to be prefect for us in our own perfect time?

Here’s an example- while I was going through my 327 page check list of things to have for the Monks stay, I noticed I didn’t have enough bottled water. I panicked! Madre de Dios! How could I possibly ask them to drink our dirty American fluorinated, chlorinated tap water? Then it struck me, as if a bolt of lightening in the darkness tapped right on the top of my head- what am I, crazy? My tap water is cleaner than most of the world’s water supply, and, although I pass when ever possible on ingesting chlorine, we probably were not going to die of dysentery or typhoid if I had to make the Starbucks with some tap water.

See what I mean? It’s really our perception of the situation that gives it meaning, not the situation itself. Our reaction to any situation depends entirely on our perception of what is happening. If we could analyze our perception of a situation for possible misunderstanding before we panic and get angry or disappointed, maybe we could save ourselves from a lot of anger and disappointment.

Anyway, that’s what I got from listening to the Monks answer that question over and over and over… now of course, the question is how do we manage to watch our thoughts, and analyze them for misunderstanding, before we react? Well, I guess that is the tricky part.

More on this topic soon…

For more on the Gaden Shartse Tour, check their web site, the link is on the right hand menu.


PS - Summa Cum Laude means- highest with honor or praise.

How I Accidentally Ended Up Leading The Presidential Motorcade Not Once, But Twice In This Lifetime- So far!

Well, it's finally here, after 8 long years of hell under the current administration, we once more get to choose between the lesser of two evils. I'm definitly going to get out and vote, and I hope you do too. To celebrate the season I've finally written the account, for your enjoyment, of my unprecedented two time brush with destiny.

I know, it's hard to believe, but honestly, it happened to me.

The first time I meandered into the presidential motorcade was way back when, when I was a student in Marietta, Georgia. One day I was minding my own business, just meandering home from classes along a route I took every day. I was driving along listening to some tunes when I became aware that something was not quite right.

I looked to the left, and I looked to the right and what did I see? Nothing. I mean no one. I mean no cars. On the normally clogged with traffic expressway, I was totally alone. I was pondering the meaning of this. Had I been transported through some worm hole to an alternate universe where traffic jams did not exist? Was it much later ( or much earlier?) than I thought and possibly I had missed the traffic entirely? Had I fallen asleep at the wheel and I was now dreaming of a life where I, and I alone, owned the road? Had the bomb dropped and somehow it missed me and everyone else was vaporized, cars and all? Had I somehow driven right into The Twilight Zone?

I came around a curve in the road and was somewhat relieved to see people standing at the corner as I approached the traffic light. But wait! Something was still not quite right. The people had guns! What the heck! And there were police cars and guys with FBI vests and what the heck had I stumbled upon? Was it a SWAT event in progress? ( and yes, believe it or not, I have also driven right into the middle of a SWAT event! Just lucky I guess.)

I wanted to just put the pedal to the metal and high tail it right outta there but the light happened to turn red and I figured with all those cops and guns and cop cars it would be a bad and immature choice to go blasting through a red light so I geared down and stopped. Right at the white line. Full stop, no rolling. Perfectly legal.

I was still pondering the whole situation when a lady, obviously employed by the Georgia State Cops, ( I'm smart, I could tell right away by the uniform, bullet proof vest and that funny brown hat, not to mention the big old shot gun she was toting), came running up to the car screaming and gesturing in a wild manner. I realized she was probably not going to shoot because there were to many witnesses, so I turned the music down and rolled the window down.

" Can I help you?", I asked.
"What are you doing here?", she screamed.
"Um, driving home from school?" I asked.
"How did you get through the road block?", she was still screaming, (very excitable for a cop I thought).
"Um, what road block?", I asked.

Then she went on gesturing wildly and telling me the whole road system for miles around was blocked off for the presidential motorcade, which, apparently was due to arrive at that very corner in 3.7 Milli-seconds.

"Um, I never saw a road block?", I asked while I was thinking - what kind of dinky little road block could they have set up, if I didn't even see it while I apparently drove right through it!

At this question she started gesturing in an even more wildly agitated way and asked me where I got on the road. So I told her the entrance ramp I had taken onto the expressway and she started hollering into her walkie-talkie and I guessed, from the conversation, that the cops, the FBI and probably the CIA as well had made a little boo-boo. Their impenetrable net was hanging wide open and I was the little fishy that got through and swam right up in their faces. Good thing I wasn't some wild eyed, voice hearing, crazy militia type with a beef against society as a whole and the president in particular.

I did my best to radiate love and good will and all that crap while I was sweating bullets wondering if I was gonna be dragged from the car, cuffed and held for questioning. I was ready to pledge my allegiance to the flag, swear under oath I had voted for this president and beg for mercy.

I didn't have to do any of the above because my calm loving good-will to all vibe was obvious even to the wildly gesturing cop lady and she told me to turn left and do it quick. WOW! Permission to run the red light!

I put it in gear, hit the metal and swung around the corner just in time to see the motorcade fly by in my rear view mirror.

Well, I thought that was a once in a life time incident, but what the heck do I know?

Many years pass- moons wax and wane, seasons change following seasons that change, trees bud and go dormant, clock hands spin relentlessly. Presidents come and go.

I'm meandering home from the pool hall in my beat up Chevy ( Honest officer, I'm a patriot! I'm driving American made!) and I hear a funny noise. Not a funny Ha Ha noise, but a funny- oh no! That doesn't sound good noise. So I pull over and inspect the car and I find a flat tire! Well, no wonder the road felt a little bumpy.

So I'm standing on the side of the road trying to guess whether I have a spare tire and a jack, and looking for a pick up truck with a good looking brawny type guy to drive up so I can flag down some assistance, when I notice there is not another car on the road. How odd, I thought. No traffic. (I didn't get the hint right away). I figure I'm on my own so I walk around the back of the car and before I can pop the trunk a big black car pulls up on the shoulder of the road and stops really close to my car. I'm suspicious immediately. I ask myself to quickly review the possible weapons I have in the car, like a road map, several empty to go coffee cups, an extra pair of socks, a sweater and a pen. Damn! Where's the base ball bat when you need it?

The big black car vomits two big guys in identical suits. Now I'm really suspicious because I'm thinking - when was the last time your road side assistance came in the form of a couple of guys in tailor made suits, white starched shirts, Italian loafers and aviator sunglasses? Never- Right? So I start backing away and glancing around looking for the traffic that should have been around, but was not.

"Can I help You?", I ask.
" What are you doing parked here?" One says.
" I'm not parked here, I have a flat tire?" I ask as I wonder what wall street firm this brilliant guy works for.

They take a moment to ponder this and then say, " The presidential motorcade is on the way, you have to move this car".
I just laugh.
"Take a look, do you think it's going to move before I change the tire?"

So they ask me a few more questions like where have you been and where are you going while they look at the flat as a pancake tire. I give them permission to look in the car and they glance in the windows and announce they have to get this car out of here.
" Do you have a spare?" they finally get around to asking.
"Damn I hope so?" I ask as I circle around to open the trunk, which when I do, causes them to jump back gasping and fondling their holsters. Of course, in the trunk lies my big black pool cue case which I guess to a FBI indoctrinated mind looks just like a bazooka case. They get all fidgety as I explain it's just my pool cue case. It's obvious they are now on orange alert and are eying me trying to figure out if I'm wired to detonate the pool cue case from a remote location.

" Don't touch it", they yell as I start to lift it off the trunk floor which of course is the hatch to get to the spare tire and jack. I drop the case and they move in, quick to get between me and the threatening pool cue case. Now I want to laugh again but realize that might not be wise, so I give them permission to open the case. Which they do and are satisfied to see that indeed, it's a pool cue case.

By now they are at ease and start glancing at their identical watches and again start talking about getting this car out of here.

I stand along side the road, watching for the coming motorcade while these two guys in suits perform like a pit crew at the Indy 500. I have to say that FBI academy must have a real good course in changing tires because once they decided to take that action, that old tire was off and the spare on in no time. Taking their suit jackets off took longer than changing the tire.

Once they were done with the tire they instructed me to "haul ass to the nearest intersection and get off this street". I thanked them and did as instructed, watching in my rear view mirror, and again, as I turned I saw the presidential motorcade flash by in my rear view mirror. I was only moments ahead of them and thus, technically, leading the presidential motorcade for the second time in this life time- so far.

The Monks Are Coming- Part Two

Yes, It's true I have been very busy with school ( it's getting easier, grading the second paper went much faster than the first), and putting the tour stop together for "My Monks". I like to call them that, my Monks, but really they are the Monks of Gaden Shartse Norling College Buddhist Monastic University.

I met them a little over 10 years ago when I saw an ad in a paper, it said - Wanted- office space for Buddhist healings. Host 8 Monks for one week in October.

Well, I had a large office with multiple treatment rooms, so how could I resist? I answered the ad, was interviewed by the local tour stop director, and got the gig. A few weeks later there were Monks and people and bells ringing and feathers floating and incense burning and a whole bunch a goings on in the office, and I was a little intimidated, but totally fascinated by those Monks!

On that tour there were several very elderly Monks who had tales of Tibet before China. There were several young Monks who were enjoying the freedom and abundance of American culture for the first time- they had a lot of questions- and there were all the wonderful people I met who were assisting the Monks in their journey of fund raising for the Monastery that houses not only the Monks, but many children who escape from China/Tibet and have no one in India but the Monks.

The first time I met "my Monks", I really knew nothing about Buddhism, but hey, I'm the curious sort, so I thought it would be a great learning experiance, and it was. Since that first meeting I have learned a lot more about the belief system that is the heart of Tibet. I am not a Buddhist, but I have to say they sure do have some really great ideas about how to look at life, and live life.

Now that I know more about Buddhism, I appreciate the Monks journey even more. They always remind me that nothing lasts forever. Nothing. Change is inevitable. If you know this, and accept it, then you can be much more at ease with all the changes that swirl around you in real life. By not clinging to things, you are less upset when things change, which they always do.

They also remind me that we create a lot of our own suffering or sadness in the world by our attitudes or mental states. Often when we are upset, we could choose to look at the upsetting situation differently, and if we did that, we would not be so upset. It's really entirely up to us how we view things and sometimes our view is the problem.

In Buddhism, every life is important, even the lowly bug. They teach compassion for all beings, no matter how small. If you can look at another- even in times of conflict- and see them as a being just struggling to find their way in this world, trying to do their best ( which in your opinion may be pretty bad) , then maybe you can find a gem of forgiveness or understanding in your heart and give it to them. If you can do this, it makes you a better person and the world a more peaceful place.

Tibetan Buddhism is very different from Zen Buddhism or other types of Buddhism, ( no, it's not all the same although the underlying principles are) , Tibetan Buddhism has many aspects of the original religion of Tibet which was called Bon. In Bon, there were many spirits or Gods, and magic was common. Tibetan Buddhism has a number of deities and they can be brought into your presence by complicated rituals. This reminds me that there really is still magic in the world.

So, the tour is off to a good start, I've booked them for performances almost every evening they are here, and healings most of the days, and time to rest as well, because last time they visited we had them so fully booked they were tired by the end of their stay. This time, I think they may need time to meditate and I know me and my friends, we need time to just sit with the Monks, get our questions answered and baske in that healing Monk energy.

Is It October Already?

Yes, I think it is. I can look out the window and see the leaves falling, the sky a cool blue and the sun light filtering in at a different angle than it did a month ago. I am turning on exterior lights at the office, as the night comes earlier, sometimes before I am done with work. The stores are full of Halloween treats and my porch is filling up with wood pellets for the stove. It must be fall.

It seems like just a week ago it was August.

The fall always makes me feel a little sad, because I hate to see the summer go. I don't enjoy winter much and I miss the daylight. I'm thankful we are already half way to the suns turning back point, the winter solstice, which happens right around the 20th of December. From that day on, the sun comes and stays a bit longer each day. I'm definitely a sun worshiper, and if there is such a thing as past lives, I'm sure I was involved in some sun worshiping society.

Researchers will tell you it's just science, biochemistry really, that the sun being absorbed through our skin causes a cascade of chemical reactions which make us feel good, sleep well, and be happy. I can see their point, I'm sure biochemistry is involved. I think though, it's more than that. I think we may be a species that seeks the light, in what ever form we find it. I think maybe when we see the sun in the sky, it reminds us, at some deep level that the light is within us, shines on us, makes us warm. Sunlight, to me, just seems cheery, it brightens the day and the corners of one's mind. It reveals clearly what lies about us. Because of it, we can see.

Because I'm admitting to myself fall is here, I'm accepting it, what choice do I have? The world keeps spinning- right? So I'm looking forward to putting up my Christmas lights. A primitive ritual to help ward off the long dark nights of winter. I love to see houses all lit up, entire neighborhoods a twinkle, as we hold off the darkness for another winter, and create a reminder that the sun will return. Somehow, it makes the winter seem warmer.

Casserole Ladies

My good friend passed away at the age of 88. She told me she was ready to go, had lived a good long life and now, just wanted to get on with it. She was ready to go home. My friend knew in her heart that she was going somewhere better and would be reunited with her loved ones, where she would wait with them, preparing to welcome those she had left behind. My friend was a woman of faith.

My friends passing sparked a scandal. She was a very active member of the community for all of her life, and gossip has it that the church auxiliary, the VFW auxiliary and the volunteer fireman's auxiliary are fighting over who gets the honor of feeding the crowd of people expected at the funeral. Meanwhile, the town had to call an emergency board meeting to approve funds for a county sheriff to direct traffic on Main street during the calling hours because of the expected influx of visitors to a one stoplight town. The final estimate was somewhere near 8,397 callers and just as many flowers. My friend was well known and loved in her community.

Casserole ladies have started arriving by the droves as we sort through boxes of photos, discuss which dress she looked best in, and pass a box of tissues. I have to ask myself – Am I living a life that will bring droves of casserole ladies to my doorstep after I pass? I hope so.

My friend believed in the Bible, she asked me if I had read it, I think she was surprised when I said yes, I had, twice. She said I should read the Bible more, there is lots of good stuff in there. Then she said she figured I was doing pretty good for someone who had only read the Bible twice. So Hey, I got that going for me.

101 Posts

Today I hit a milestone. Well, didn't exactly hit it- hey, what does that mean anyway, hit a milestone? It's more like I arrived at it as I posted my 101st article to my blog. For me, that is a lot of writing and a lot of great practice for my future best sellers. Thanks for reading. - Meandering

Runaway Buckboard!

The buck board had been piled high with supplies when I left the town a few hours (or was it a few life times?) ago. The sun was shining, birds singing. The horses sauntered along, the rhythmic clip clop of their hooves causing the relaxing alpha waves to enter my brain. I was awake, aware, but very relaxed as we sailed along across the expansive dry open desert. A luminous turquoise sky above stretched from one horizon to the other, suggesting the immensity of the ball of dirt, hurtling through space, that we call a planet. Wide open was what came to my mind, that feeling of growth and possibility and freedom - wide open.

I can’t say I know what spooked those horses, but spooked they became. One moment we were sailing like a boat on a calm lake and the next we were rough shot right out of a cannon and hurtling forward at a speed that felt like something Einstein imagined. I was holding the reigns as best I could, as I struggled to stay in the seat. I was sliding back and forth and bouncing up and down so fast I wasn’t sure what was up and what was down. I held those reigns but just, I certainly wasn’t in control of the wagon. The bushes and rock formations seemed to speed by, it was as if we were still and the world was moving way to fast. I guess a jolt of adrenalin will do that to you, change your perspective and maybe switch things around in your head.

I glanced over my shoulder and saw the load on the back of the wagon begin to topple. No wonder, we were plummeting down a narrow lane, bouncing every time we hit a rock or stand of sage brush. With every bounce, the wagon gave a shudder that became a bone rattling jolt, then, sighed like a forty year veteran of door to door sales. At any moment I expected to see nails start rocketing out of the wood rails of the buck board, shooting up like popcorn popping in a pan with no lid. At any moment I expected the wagon to wrench apart, boards screaming, nails popping, splinters flying, just like a big whaler on the open ocean caught in a category 4 hurricane.

As the load teetered on the edge and then fell, I saw my things flying off into the dirt, bouncing, and bouncing again, and rolling away. The dust was so thick and I was going so fast that I could just make out the shapes of my things, just for a moment, as they bounced away behind me, left on the trail for some future passer-by to pick up. My half finished children’s book, my illustrations for another book, my paintings of vacation spots I have loved. My yoga workout and my bike rides, my hours of reading mystery novels. My time to write interesting, entertaining, enlightening articles for the loyal readers of my blog. All, all, bouncing behind me down the lane.

Honestly my dear readers, I’m sure things are going to calm down here soon, I will get used to the new job, it will get easier and less time consuming as I go along, and soon, very soon, I’m sure I will have my life reigned back in to a meandering pace and I will re-claim my time to write.

The Monks Are Coming!

I'm still getting acclimated to my role as professor for a class of 46 university students. The class is going great, I'm still adjusting to the early mornings and to the technology- ie:the software used for all homework and grading. It may take me the rest of the week to get that down, I went to a class today for all us new instructors, and the IT classrooms system was down ( WHAT?!, you gotta be kidding!) so we really could not get into the program to look at it or ask questions. I said heck with that and came home, booted up and got to it. It's a little tricky but I'm getting the hang of it and it's a good thing because there are 46 papers sitting there waiting for me to grade!

Meanwhile, I've done a bunch of meandering but have not captured it on paper as of right now. So I thought you might like to take a look at a few photos from the last "monks tour". The Monks (Gaden Shartse) will be visiting us again this fall and I am just starting to get the tour stop put together. As we go along I will share photos and news with you, meanwhile I hope you enjoy these.

For more information, look to the side bar on the right for a link to the official tour website.

Spinning

I’ve been percolating for a few days on this idea of change. Why are most humans so uncomfortable with change? One of my friends recently told me she did wash, not because she was out of clean clothes, but because she was out of her favorite clean clothes. See what I mean? We like to get cozy with certain things, places and patterns in our lives and just stay there. Like our favorite clothes, our patterns are our comfort. That is, until our patterns become a rut. That, how ever is a whole ‘nother matter and I’m just contemplating the why of change in the here and now. (Remember, I’m really practicing being rather than doing, and being means just being here and now).

So I watched a good movie a few nights ago, Martian Child. I got it because that handsome guy John Chusak is in it and I figured even if the movie was a bomb the scenery would be great , and the movie was actually good and John was looking great. He’s aging with style and I’m looking forward to the release of the movie he wrote and produced called War Inc., due out in October. Originally scheduled for release last spring, now it won’t be out ‘till after the elections- geeze, wonder why? Dan Ackroyd will be in it as well, it’s a follow up to the movie Grosse Pointe Blank that they did together way back when, so that right there makes it worth seeing.

Any-hoo, in Martian Child John’s character makes a long speech about how weird this whole life is, we are spinning on a planet ( 700 to 1000 miles an hour depending on if you are at the equator or the poles), around a spinning star ( the sun spins at a speed of 4,400 miles an hour) in the spinning arm of galaxy ( our galaxy spins at 140 miles a second) that’s spinning across the universe ( at 190 miles a second), meanwhile every atom in our body is spinning and I said Eureka! That is it!

Maybe we all cling to our favorite clothes because we are so tiny, little, small. We are to small to actually see and feel all this enormous movement that is going on all around us but maybe at some instinctual level we know, we can feel, our DNA twirl, our atoms spinning, our earth revolving around the sun which spins in a solar system, spinning in a galaxy that spins out across the never ending void of the universe.

Just look around you, every moment is change and every season is change. Just sit in the yard and watch the lawn grow, the flowers bloom and die. Or drive around your favorite town. Homes go up, buildings come down, business opens and another closes. Look at your photo album, you once looked like that, every day you changed a little, now you look like this. It can’t be stopped.

You are constantly changing, as your cells die and new ones are replacing them. You think you have the same body your whole life, but really, all your cells are replaced many times over your life so even your same body is an illusion. No wonder we are grasping for a little stability!

We are so little, tiny, small that we can’t feel the earth spinning, but maybe we know. Maybe somehow we do feel all this never ending motion that makes up our very being and our whole incredibly humongous environment. Maybe at some level all that large moving stuff makes us feel like an ant holding onto the branch of a tree in the fall wind. Holding on for dear life as everything swirls on around, holding on just trying to remain with feet planted .

Maybe we are just craving some small spot of stillness. A place of no movement. A place to hold on. Maybe our favorite clothes, the painting that has hung on that wall in that house for 30 years, the favorite recliner tattered and worn, the familiar grocery store with every item exactly where we expect it to be helps us to forget for a moment that we, just like everything else in existence are spinning. Maybe we can’t help this clinging, maybe we think if we let go of our familiar, our routine our same whatever- maybe we think we are going to spin right off into space.

And even though a favorite shirt lasts maybe 8 or 10 years, and that is an amazing infinitesimal amount of time when it comes to the span of time in space, maybe because we are so small, just having that same thing, place, person or routine for ten years makes us confident, gives us stillness and a thread of consistency to hang on to. Maybe it makes us feel like we are moving in the stillness rather than still in the movingness. Maybe it gives us a feeling of rest.

Maybe we are resistant to change because if we can just hold a few things still in our tiny lives, we can feel like we are bigger than we are. We can feel like we are in control. Then maybe our intuitive understanding of the vastness and the speed of it all won’t be quite so scary.

Where Have I Been?

Did I tell Ya'll I just got a job teaching a holistic health class at a major University?
Yep, Imagine that.

Any hoo- I let them talk me into it at the last moment and classes started this week. I'm still trying to find my e-mail address and set up my program to communicate with students. Nothing is done on paper these days! I also have a smart room, which is really cool because you know I love that technological stuff.

Today I managed to get into the system with my new ID, got the room powered up and was all ready to show the class how to find Linus Pauling ( 2 time Nobel prize winning chemist who studied vitamin C and concluded it could kill cancer cells- ever hear of him? No, neither has anyone else... ) and the projector would not project! I changed settings and messed with buttons and finally picked up the Bat phone- Yes, IT has an emergency line much like Bat Man had. The bat phones are located in each smart room in case people like me can't get the projector to project.

I dialed the emergency extension which took me right to that super smart girl in IT. I explained that the projector would not project. She said "is the projector button on?"
Well of course, I'm not a total idiot I thought. "Yes".
"Is the source button turned to PC?" She asked "Yes " again.
"Is the cabinet open?"she asked.
"What cabinet?" I replied.
"The one the projector is in at the back of the room."

OK, maybe I am an idiot. Thank God I was early and the whole class did not see that.


Any-hoo, I have a few days off over this long weekend and plan to get something new posted here for you real soon!

Summer

Gulls swirl high then hang in the air,
suspended for a moment on the air currents.

Wind streaming inland cools,
basking adventurers on beach towels and blankets,
becoming one with the sun and the sand.

Waves crashing at the rocks of a huge inland ocean
lull the lizard-like people out of their daily thoughts and into a rhythmic vacation trance state.
All is forgotten.

That Stephen King Feeling

I've adopted bike riding as my sport for this summer. I found a nice old fashioned, nothing fancy bike with shiny chrome fenders and I started peddling. I think I might be naturally nosy, because I am enjoying riding around the town I live in, snooping into other peoples lives. I mean, driving in a car you really don't notice a lot of what is happening in your neighborhood, but on a bike, well that is a whole 'nother story.

I live in a town that has a lot of homes, in fact, most of them, built in the 1800's, including my own, built in 1895. All the main neighborhoods are that old, occasionally I go off into a side road neighborhood and they may be late blooming developments from the 40' and 50's, nothing more recent. Among the older homes are scattered homes from the 20's, a large sprinkling of craftsman style cottages and other past years infill building.

I frequently also ride through the main cemetery. Many of the headstones are worn smooth they are so old, and I have found birth dates back to the early 1700's. Anyway, I lose track of time and distance when I'm riding around engrossed in the neighborhoods.

Oh, number 26 has a big cat on the porch! That old junker in the backyard of 365 is gone..., I see "miss circa 1808" is getting a new coat of paint, I can't believe how much junk is in the back yard of that blue house. I wonder why it looks like no one lives in that place, and why hasn't the car at # 1902 moved in two weeks? I start to make up stories to go with the houses. Old Aunt Mildred lives here and does not want to open her curtains ever because she is afraid of the aliens living next door. Sometimes I just get a feeling from the house, I mean, you can kind of tell if a home is happy or not just by looking at it, right?

Example- Picture the home in Leave It To Beaver, or My Three Sons- got it? OK, now picture the home in Alfred Hitchcock's ground breaking classic movie Psycho. See what I mean? Ya kinda get a feel for what's going on inside. Any hoo, I don't have a run away imagination or anything like that, but I have to tell you, almost all the homes in my town look like the one in Psycho, only nicer. Some of them even have paint to rival San Francisco's famous painted ladies, but still, they are those kind of psycho style houses.

So maybe that explains what happened the other day, maybe at the heart of the matter is my life long fear of that movie Psycho, honestly, I still can't take a shower with out getting nervous.

But, as I was saying I was riding around town, being nosy and looking at all the houses and gardens and all and I had the feeling that something was watching me back. I was in the neighborhood with the three huge homes built by the first doctor who lived in town. He built a huge home on the top of the only hill in town, then, he built two homes for his two daughters, one on each side of his own. Guess he wanted them to settle nearby.

I got the feeling that those eyebrow trimmed windows were raised at me, and those houses were whispering back and forth about me. I wondered at the fact that most of the homes in this town are older than anyone who lives here. Really, it's their town. We humans are just passing through. We are temporary maintenance persons for the lumbering hulk of these Victorian and Gothic revival beauties; we are not that important except in our role to make sure they survive another generation. Then I got that creepy Stephen King kind of feeling. What if they were watching? What if they didn't like me snooping around all the time? What if...

Adventures in Ghostwriting

Well, here I am again at the weekend and wondering where that whole week went. Actually, I'm wondering where that whole month of July went, last thing I remember I was laying in the sun and saying thanks for the long fourth of July weekend. Maybe it has something to do with my new job.

I'm a ghost writer now. It's kind of like being a ghost rider but instead of the cool bike I have a ergonomically correct desk chair. Still, I'm using my extraordinary talents to fight the menace of blank internet websites, and so far, I'm kicking butt with over 90% of my articles accepted for publishing.

Yes, it looks like I did not do a whole lotta writing in the past month, but the truth is I wrote one hundred and seven articles in the month of July. My one hundred and seven articles were posted on various web sites and under various names. Some of them were bought with a contract that said someone else was going to claim they wrote it and I could not ever tell anyone otherwise. Notice how, right now, I'm not naming any names? That's because I respect and honor my contracts.

Some of my articles were posted under nome de plumes. This is cool, because remember back in April? I wrote that whole article on getting a fine nome de plume? (April 16th, a Wednesday) Well, now I have a few of them. I'm Gretta Buttinski, Juan A. Bee, Leslie from Camden, and Drinkin A. Cuppajoe, among others. I've been so many different people in the last month I'm starting to feel like I have multiple personalities.

I've written dozens of 125 word blog posts, 250 word product reviews, 300 word articles, 400 word articles and the dreaded 700 word articles in which I must use the key word "guano" at least 3 times but not more than 5 times and the key phrase "guano maneuvers" at least 4 times and not more than 7 times and I must provide an attention grabbing headline of not more than 65 characters which uses the key term once and ends in the word "sparkling". I must have no more and no less than 6 paragraphs and each paragraph must have at least 40 words. Oh, and please be positive, no references to drugs or alcohol and for heavens sake, don't try to be funny, if we wanted humor we would ask for a funny 700 word article about guano maneuvers.

In the time it took to write the 700 word directions, they could have written the article themselves and saved a few bucks! But hey, then I wouldn't be working as a ghost writer.

I've written reviews on washers, dryers and lawnmowers. I've reviewed dance classes, moving companies, drum lessons, craft classes and emergency room visits. I've given advice to guys wanting to get their old girlfriends back, girls wanting to know how to deal with a cheating spouse, people wanting to get a cheap flight to South Africa, people wanting to know how to pick a hair style that fits their face, and parents wanting to know how to take a family of 6 to Six Flags with out breaking the bank.

I've given instructions for taming fly-away hair, making gift boxes, decorating the front stoop, giving a tea party and keeping the babysitter, once you find one that is really good. I have advised the love lorn and encouraged the backsliding bible thumper. One of my favorite how-to articles was about how to be safe on the open ocean in a 40 foot sailboat, and what to do if you get close to a storm you can't outrun. ( Secure everything, put on your pfd's -personal flotation devices, set off the homing beacon, close the hatches and call the Coast Guard, Dummies!).

So, as you can see, my many life experiences are coming in pretty handy now that I am a ghost writer.

Hey, and the pay isn't bad, considering I am working in my pj's only three feet from the coffee pot and three feet from the refrigerator and I don't have to listen to some idiot called a supervisor and I don't have to commute. I can work when I want and choose my jobs from a daily list of literally thousands of jobs. I can work for a couple hours, go for a bike ride, then work for another couple hours- no one cares! The only down side I can see is that my bloggers butt is sore and my mousers shoulder is acting up, otherwise it's not a bad gig. If my coffee pot and refrigerator were located on a beach in the south pacific, I would say it's perfect!

So, listen, I'm definitly thinking about you, my readers and I am working to submit at least two fresh posts to my blog each week, so check back later, I will have something new for you.